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Seeking Freedom From The Trauma Bond and The Grips Of Codependency?

And if you’re currently in therapy, you can achieve deeper, faster relief right now.

If you want to break free of craving for the abuser, the obsessive need to please, and the fear of being alone forever, I can help.

Keep On Reading To Learn How This Is Possible For You

Marshall Burtcher

Mentor To Survivors Of Narcissistic Relationships

HAVE YOU BEEN...

HAVE YOU BEEN...

  • Stalking your ex on social media?
  • Obsessively checking email, texts, and chat?
  • Fixated on them being with another person?
  • Constantly wondering where they are and what they’re doing?
  • Hoping and dreaming of reconciliation?
  • Feeling intense waves of sadness, grief, and feeling crazy?
  • Feeling lost, empty, and lonely without them?
  • Wondering what you did to deserve this?
  • Fixating on the “good times” and blaming yourself for the “bad times”?
  • Stuck in a loop of going back, only to suffer an incredible amount of pain, confusion, and abuse, and then leave again?
  • Wondering where you lost yourself?

THIS IS CODEPENDENCY TALKING

THIS IS CODEPENDENCY TALKING

Codependency (aka The Trauma bond, or “Love Addiction”) is the root of the pain and confusion you’ve been suffering with. It is the direct result of a specific relating cycle called, The Seduction-Abuse-Discard or S.A.D. Cycle.

This cycle puts you through an emotional roller-coaster of Euphoria, Distress, and Despair.   This see-saw of emotions chemically hooks your brain on the relationship.

You know that high you get when they love you back?  That is called Euphoria.  That intense distress you’ve lived with for so long is called “Attachment Distress”.  And the deep, dark lows you’ve endured are called “Despair”. 

These sharp swings in emotional states gives you a feast-for-famine experience of love in the relationship and teaches you to crave them.

To survive this cycle, you get lost in a fantasy that they’ll stop their abusive behaviors and you and them will live in bliss forever. 

Their occasional breadcrumbs of love and affection gives you hope (this is called Intermittent Reinforcement).  This is why you stay.

This is how toxic relationships destroy your sense of self, worth, and peace.

I’ve helped 1000’s of survivors of love addiction return to sanity, peace, and connection in their lives (some after years of trying in traditional therapy).

What did they all need?

THEY NEEDED...

THEY NEEDED...

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A PROVEN PROCESS  TO FOLLOW: Love addiction is rooted in severe neglect of your core needs and a belief that only a special other can complete you.  You need a step-by-step process that helps you undo the neglect, restore your sense of connection to yourself, heal the loneliness and bring healthy connection back into your life.

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THE RIGHT KNOWLEDGE: Survivors of narcissistic abuse and codependency comes from a different world than those who haven’t been through that hell.

This means you need the correct knowledge at the right time to make the correct changes and choices that result in lasting healing for yourself.

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THE TOOLS & PRACTICES THAT ADDRESS THE CORE CAUSES: Love addiction is a symptom of deep loneliness, disconnection from one’s self and value, and an incomplete sense of self.  Survivors that heal need the right practices that help them develop a healthy relationship with themselves and helps them tap into their value as a human being, rather than an object.

Survivors learn how to calm their pain and distress, tap into their core worth, and build warmth and connection with themselves and others.

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THE CORRECT EXPERIENCE & TIMING:  Understanding your experiences helps you make wiser choices.  To have that right understanding, you need to have the correct experiences in the correct time.  Survivors build confidence and clarity fast when they know how to respond to the milestones in relationships as well as how to walk the path to those milestones.

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A SAFE HAVEN: Survivors need real-time, active feedback on their experiences.  A strong community coupled with bi-weekly live mentoring beyond the classroom helps them succeed fast and maintain their growth and achievements.

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ON-GOING RELIABLE RESOURCES & REINFORCEMENT: Most survivors I’ve worked with needed consistent access to support, feedback, cheer-leading, and celebration as they ventured into the world and experienced life.  Knowing someone has your back makes adventure and risk so much safer. 

FROM THE MOUTH OF STUDENTS...

FROM THE MOUTH OF STUDENTS...

IF YOU WANT YOUR SANITY, SAFETY AND SELF BACK, I CAN HELP

IF YOU WANT YOUR SANITY, SAFETY AND SELF BACK, I CAN HELP

I’ve found most survivors are drowning in a sea of information.  They lack structure, support, and direction.   This cycle of disappointment and failure ends when they have the right structure, support, and knowledge.  
Survivors begin to heal, find peace, and find sanity again when they have the practices, support, and tools that are tailored for their unique journey.
 
I help them achieve this through The Heal Yourself Strategy™.

INTRODUCING THE HEAL YOURSELF STRATEGY™

INTRODUCING THE HEAL YOURSELF STRATEGY™

The Heal Yourself Strategy™ is built specifically for survivors struggling to untangle themselves from the abuser in their lives, feeling crazy, and trying to claw their way back to life.

The Heal Yourself Strategy™ addresses the intense distress survivors feel when they lose contact/connection with the abuser, the distrust in their own sense of reality, and the deep loneliness they’ve lived with for ages through a proven path that restores their sanity, peace, and connection in the mind and body.

The Heal Yourself Strategy™ has one objective: Bring You Back To Yourself

IT ACHIEVES THIS IN 3 STEPS:

IT ACHIEVES THIS IN 3 STEPS:

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STEP ONE: RESTORE SAFETY

The nausea, the pounding heart, the sense of panic and distress, the gutting sensation – these are all results of what I call “attachment distress”. 

This distress results from having your sense of connection and access to the other person threatened or actually severed.

This leaves you feeling shattered, lost, emptied, and frozen. 

I guide you through warming, thawing, and then healing this distress using specific practices, including:

  • Somatic grounding practices
  • Building emotional space and capacity to feel
  • Bringing legitimacy to your experiences and feelings
  • Regulating and comforting your distress and pain at losing them or feeling separated from them

 

You leave step one knowing how to comfort your pain, bring peace to your mind, and how to nurture yourself emotionally and mentally.

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STEP TWO: RESTORE SANITY

Wondering what is real?

You start to make sense of what is real because you start to believe your experience, its validity, and its importance.  

You’re no longer referencing reality through someone else’s point of view.

You restore sanity and realize your truth through 4 specific practices:

  • The Reflection Practice
  • Acknowledgment Of You
  • Legitimization Of You
  • Sane Making

 

Using these practices, you will exit this step:

  • Knowing what is real & what is not
  • Being able to identify your feelings, wants, and needs
  • Finding and using your voice
  • Breaking yourself out of the “trance” the seduction phase puts you in
  • Embracing and living your POWER and FREEDOM
  • Feeling more real emotional connection, both within you and with others
  • Having ended your sense of emotional isolation (aka internalized loneliness)
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STEP THREE: RESTORE SOVEREIGNTY

We lost ourselves by enmeshing with the other person, defining ourselves against their approval and rejection.  We never really came to know who we are to discover what we wanted, felt or needed.

This kept us trapped in the cycle of codependency and seeking ourselves through others.

My students rediscover themselves through a gentle, simple practice called “Differentiation”.  This is how you will come to really identify with yourself and know what you think, feel, and sense.

You will exit this step with the ability to:

  • Foster warm, safe inward connection with your exiled inner selves
  • Nurture your 10 core needs
  • Calm your attachment distress and anxiety
  • Distinguish between your feelings and thoughts and theirs
  • Lean in and trust yourself more
  • Be more of yourself despite their rejection or approval

REAL PEOPLE SHARING THEIR JOURNEY

REAL PEOPLE SHARING THEIR JOURNEY

Real People.

Healing Their Trauma.

Living Their Happiness.

From Love Addiction & Deep Shame to Freedom and Play

From Fear to Loving His Relationship, Life and Career

From Confusion and Lost to Direction and Clarity

THIS RESULTS IN YOUR ABILITY TO...

THIS RESULTS IN YOUR ABILITY TO...

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CALM ANXIETY, PANIC AND FEAR FAST

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START NURTURING YOURSELF IN KIND, LOVING WAYS QUICKLY

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IDENTIFY WHAT IS REAL SO YOU ARE NO LONGER MANIPULATED

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WALK AWAY FROM WHAT DOESN'T WORK FOR YOU DESPITE WHAT YOU FEEL FOR THEM

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BUILD SELF-CONFIDENCE, SELF-RESPECT, & SELF-LOVE

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IDENTIFY AND KNOW YOURSELF MORE AND MORE

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BUILD HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

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CREATE LASTING FRIENDSHIPS THAT NOURISH, SUPPORT, AND EMPOWER YOU, YOUR LIFE, AND YOUR WELL-BEING

AND BE FREE TO DISCOVER & LIVE WHO YOU ARE

COURSE INFORMATION

COURSE INFORMATION

The Course Details

    • Length: 22 Modules Taught Over 22 Weeks
    • Each module includes a 2-hour training & weekly practices for homework
    • Weekly practices take around 20 minutes on average a day
    • Classes are provided in video and audio (mp3) format
    • Includes access to over 50+ hours of training, comprehensive PDF guides for the practices, and 20+ MP3 tools, including guided meditations, release tools, and more

The Course Modules

The curriculum is broken down into sections.  Each builds on the one previous to it, teaching you a new lifestyle and daily living practice that sets you up for lasting success.

 

SECTION ONE: RESTORING SAFETY & EMOTIONAL REGULATION

Module One:
Topic: Trauma, The 3 Safeties And Regulation

Module Two:
Topic: Restoring Safe Emotional  Connection With Self

Module Three:
Topic: Building Inward Awareness

Module Four:
Topic: Restoring Emotional Flow

Module Five:
Topic: Increasing Emotional Regulation

Module Six:
Topic: Building Relational Safety

 

SECTION TWO: RESTORING SANITY & REALITY

Module One:
Topic: The Origin Of Your Codependency

Module Two:
Topic:  The Fantasy

Module Three:
Topic: Restoring Reality

Module Four:
Topic:  Sober Reality – Part One

Module Five:
Topic: Sober Reality – Part Two

 

SECTION THREE: REGULATING ATTACHMENT & NEEDS

Module One:
Topic: The Invisible Force Behind It All

Module Two:
Topic: Enmeshment and Individuation

Module Three:
Topic: Intra-attachment

Module Four:
Topic: Nurturing Your Needs

Module Five:
Topic:  Regulating Interpersonal Attachment

 

SECTION FOUR: RESTORING YOUR PERSONAL SOVEREIGNTY

Module One:
Topic:  Your Being

Module Two:
Topic: Differentiation

Module Three:
Topic: Differentiation Yourself

Module Four:
Topic: Nature Of Personal Power

Module Five:
Topic: Boundaries

Module Six:
Topic: Self-Respect & Conclusion

INCLUDES LIVE SUPPORT FOR LIFE*...

INCLUDES LIVE SUPPORT FOR LIFE*...

LIVE MENTORING HOURS™ ($4999/yr)

ACCELERATE YOUR HEALING & HAPPINESS WITH LIVE GROUP SUPPORT & COACHING

Live Mentoring Hours is your chance to get custom coaching from Marshall at any time in your journey through the trainings. 

Live Mentoring Hours includes:

    • Access to the Live Mentoring Hours Vault.  Watch over 2 years worth of custom trainings for past students
    • Access to the twice-a-week live group support (aka Live Mentoring Hours)  that happen on Tuesdays @6PM MDT and Thursdays @ 11am MDT (Mountain Time, Boise Idaho)
    • You’re no longer doing it alone.  You’ve got the support of Marshall and the Community at your back each step of the way
     
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HOMEWORK HOURS™ ($3000/yr)

HOMEWORK DONE TOGETHER

Do course homework in the warmth and presence of others students and Marshall.

This allows you to ask questions, share homework with others, and enjoy companionship.

Homework Hours details:

    • Access to the twice-a-week live group support (aka Live Mentoring Hours)  that happen on Tuesdays @5PM MDT and Thursdays @ 10am MDT (Mountain Time, Boise Idaho)
    • You’re no longer doing it alone.  You’ve got the support of Marshall and the Community at your back each step of the way
     
  •  

LIVE & ON-LINE COMMUNITY (Priceless)

THE COMMUNITY HAS YOUR BACK

Taking the leap on your own healing is scary.  I know it was for me.  What made the difference is a warm, supportive community that I could turn to with my questions, my needs for understanding and support, and guidance.

I provide you with this support through:

  • Weekly check-ins via email on your progress
  • Email support from my staff and I (usually a 48-hour turn around)
  • Access to the private and secure Community™ of 2500+ survivors making their way through the same journey as yourself
  • Twice-a-week live group support to give you the personal touch you deserve and need in your journey

AND POWERFUL SUPPORT COURSES...

AND POWERFUL SUPPORT COURSES...

The BE CALM System ($197)

REGULATE AND CALM YOUR ANXIETY AND DISTRESS

The chaos, crazy-making, and roller-coaster of emotions and intensity is why you feel anxiety.  The BE CALM System empowers you with tools that calm your mind and body quickly.  They help you have power and have a say in what you feel

These tools are built on Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing trainings.  You will feel more calm and grounded.

The Reclaiming Yourself Course ($197)

REDISCOVER YOUR INNATE INNOCENCE AND SEE HOW YOUR HEALING FLOURISHES

Abuse and neglect may have taught you to associate yourself with being the problem.  If only you were different, right?  If only you had no needs, or different feelings, or a different personality.

This is the impact of abuse.  We begin healing it through reclaiming your innate innocence in your feelings, personality, wants, needs, and even mistakes.

The HEAL Course ($997)

HEAL THE SHAME, GUILT, FEAR, AND FATIGUE FROM YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

HEAL gently guides you in reclaiming yourself from the shame, guilt, fear,  and fatigue you learned in the toxic experiences within your relationships, including your parents, siblings, peers, partners, and yourself.

The NURTURE Course ($297)

HEAL THE EMOTIONAL NEGLECT BY RESTORING NURTURING CARE TO YOUR NEEDS

NURTURE gently teaches you a practice called “The Nurture Process”.  This simple process allows you to begin identifying, nourishing, and maintaining your emotional needs in healthy ways that promote healing interdependence and self-empowerment.

The RapidHEAL Guides ($297)

SPECIALIZED MEDITATIONS AND GUIDES THAT PROPEL YOUR HEALING AND THRIVING

The RapidHEAL Guides empower your growth and healing and add special support through gentle meditations that reprogramming your emotional associations and help you release your codependent habits.

ALL COURSES ARE...

ALL COURSES ARE...

FULLY DIGITAL

WATCH & LISTEN FROM ANYWHERE YOU HAVE INTERNET ACCESS

My courses are designed to be used from the smart phone and the desktop computer or laptop. 

This means:

  • You can log in via the Kajabi App and resume or start your course at any time
  • Listen to the course via MP3 edition or watch the video
  • Print nothing; the PDF’s are a guide; use a notebook or digital document to track your results
  • Do the practices from the convenience and privacy of your smart phone. Most practices take about 20 minutes 3-to-5 times a week.

DESIGNED FOR EFFECTIVENESS

THE RIGHT KNOWLEDGE & TOOLS YOU NEED

Each course is broken down into a series of small trainings.  These trainings build on each other (think legos).  As you advance through each training, you place another block in your healing, freedom, and peace. 

You will exit each training and each course with a new skill-set and the understanding of how to apply it to your life.

DESIGNED TO GO AT YOUR PACE

THERE'S NO RUSH!

My courses are self-paced regardless of they’re the live edition or the recorded edition.   They’re designed to adapt to your lifestyle and needs.  This is achieved with my Building-block™ course design (means they work like following a recipe).

This means:

  • You can stop at any point and focus on that step till you’re ready to move to the next step and STILL SUCCEED
  • There’s no time pressure or expectation.  Most students take their time and have wild results despite going slowly
  • Real results happen because of the PROCESS, not the knowledge or understanding you gain.  Do the processes, get the results!

GOT A QUESTION?

GOT A QUESTION?

Get An Answer

CONFIDENCE IN YOUR CHOICE IS WHAT MATTERS FIRST

Get answers to your questions by submitting your question to me and I’ll get back to you within 48 hours. 

Just click below and fill out the question form.

YOU EXIT THE COURSE WITH:

YOU EXIT THE COURSE WITH:

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YOUR SANITY: You’ll know how to discern truth from lies, how to determine what is your responsibility and theirs, and how to keep yourself sane as you navigate your sobriety.

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GREATER PEACE: You’ll know how to calm your mind, your body, and your pain using tools designed specifically for your journey.  You’ll feel more empowered in being able to care for yourself and feel more safe and at peace.

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REAL SAFETY: You’ll know what safety feels like, what you need it in, and how to determine if you’re getting that.  You’ll be able to foster and reinforce a deep, body-felt sense of safety in your space, healing loneliness and isolation.

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SOBRIETY: You’ll be able to discern reality fast, understand what is happening, and what you need to do FOR YOU and your well-being and happiness and take the appropriate actions that help you have that.

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BOUNDARIES & POWER: You will understand what boundaries you need for your well-being and will know how to use your power to create and maintain those boundaries effortlessly and with kindness and regard for yourself – not just the other person.

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YOURSELF: You’ll know how to connect with yourself, nurture your intra-connection and your inner world with you, how to keep yourself (aka sobriety), and how to build safe, secure attachment with you.

WHO THIS IS FOR

This Course Is Designed For Individuals That:

  • Identify with being a codependent
  • That struggle with trusting their own perceptions of reality
  • That doubt their feelings and senses
  • That wonder what is real
  • That feel unreal or invisible
  • That are struggling to get process in their own therapy and healing
  • That are seeking more peace, freedom, and happiness
  • That want to be themselves without fear, guilt, or shame
  • That want themselves back

There are Pre-requesites To Attend This Course:

  • Must be in therapy or seeking a trauma therapist
  • Must be in or seeking a support community online and in real life
  • Willing to do the work and take it at their own pace
  • Understand there is no quick-fix or instant healing; it takes persistence and curiosity instead
  • Understand that Marshall is not a therapist; he’s a trauma-informed coach and mentor
  • Agree to 100% responsibility for the actions and choices you take in this course

IF THIS IS YOU, JOIN THE HAPPINESS AFTER CODEPENDENCY SYSTEM TO START THIS COURSE

Meet Your Mentor

Meet Your Mentor

WHO IS MARSHALL?

I MENTOR CODEPENDENTS WHO ARE SEEKING  TO BE THEMSELVES.

After 25 years of codependency and 13 years of freedom from it, I’ve experienced a lot of emotional, relational, and mental terrain that come with knowing, loving, and living who you are.
 
I’ve built healthy, secure intimate and platonic relationships, resilient self-worth, self-trust, and peace in my personal life after a life of trauma, depression, social isolation, and failed relationships.
 
Today, I help survivors experience for themselves peace, love, connection, and the joy of knowing, loving, and living who they are.

COMMON QUESTIONS ANSWERED

COMMON QUESTIONS ANSWERED

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HOW DO I KNOW THIS IS THE RIGHT COURSE FOR ME?

Ask yourself this question and listen to you body’s response: “Will this course get me where I want to be?”

If you find yourself heavy and confused, then your answer is no.

If you find yourself light, expansive, and clear, then your body’s answer is yes.

That answer is what I call your “intuitive answer”.

Trust your inner guidance.

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WHAT IF I GET STUCK OR GO SLOWLY?

This is anticipated in the design of all my courses.  You see, this course is teaching you new practices and a new lifestyle.  It will take time to adopt, explore, and experience what you learn.

You can go at your pace and you’ll always have support and guidance along the way.

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WHAT IF I DECIDE IT ISN’T FOR ME AFTER ENROLLING?

I recommend not enrolling if you’re wrestling with this question.  Instead, share with me your concerns or questions by messaging me here: https://www.facebook.com/freetheself

There are no refunds for subscriptions.

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I’M REALLY BAD WITH TECHNOLOGY AND COMPUTERS.  WILL THAT GET IN THE WAY?

All my courses are designed to be accessed through email.  If you’re comfortable with using email, you can do the courses.

All live classes are through the ZOOM app.  Links to the ZOOM classrooms are in all class emails and titled “Link to Classroom”.  Click the link and you’ll be entered into the classroom.

If you have difficulties, reach out to support here: support@freetheself.com and we’ll help you get it working.

The only issue we do not troubleshoot is email delivery.  We recommend having a GMAIL, HOTMAIL, MSN, YAHOO account for the class emails.  Other email services may block or move to spam course emails.

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I’M IN THERAPY. WILL THIS INTERFERE?

All my courses are built on cognitive behavioral therapy, mindfulness, and somatic therapies.  This means it will likely be compatible with your therapy and enhance what you’re learning there.

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